Old Pleasures

Reading Vijay Tendulkar's Collected Plays in Translation. It's been really long since I read a play but it's a pleasure returning to my old hobby. But now I hope I can read these in Marathi itself. I'm sure I'll enjoy them more. May improve my Marathi too.

Dumbo

We've been Disney regulars for some time now and Dumbo is the latest. It's a predictable but engaging and it was a much better outing for me than the previous one, Mary Poppins Returns. May be because I had some expectations from MPR but knew nothing of Dumbo's history. Anu said the movie was a little too violent for her and I can understand that. My primary complaint was that they were hell-bent on uniting the baby and its mother in such a hurry. It came at the cost of believability and usefulness of many characters(and actors) and reduced them to mere spectators of a grand show. I mean, that was one thing I couldn't predict.

Hey, and what's with all the dead mothers in half of these movies! Why should character building happen only at the expense of mothers?

And last but not the least, what's Roshan Seth doing! That guy deserves better roles, surely. It's sad that when it comes to it, we can't go beyond Amitabh Bachchan and his overused and abused baritone.

Balcony Beauty

Sambrani Soppu(Indian Borage) bloomed in our balcony and I think this is the first time I'm seeing these flowers. It's unusual considering that they have been around me since childhood, though I've learnt to appreciate them only now. They work like magic on Anu when she catches cold. I take a couple of leaves, heat them and squeeze the juice on her head, forehead, throat and chest, before she goes to sleep. If the cold is new, it would be gone the next day and if it's old, takes another day of this process. 

Winds of Change

Can we undo it all? I doubt it.

Twisted Facts

Someone had written "Nawaz Sharif was fired from the office of the PM..." and my brain processed it as "Nawaz Sharif was fired at from the office of the PM", before I rubbed my eyes and re-read it. Is it crime serials or Saudi Arabia or my own degenerating brain? 

The Dancing Feet

Last December if someone told me Anu would take up dancing, I wouldn't have believed them. But then the Annual Day happened, she got into a group dance and I watched in awe as she took to dancing as if it was in her bones. She would dance everywhere, even on the roads and while bathing, and now the near-impossible is here; she wants to learn Bharatanatya!

I joined Bharatanatya classes right at her age and I think mostly to make up the numbers for the teacher, who was some sort of celebrity. Some of my father's friends had got hold of him to take lessons for their children and I got added, along with two of my friends. I still remember the trepidation with which I met the teacher, a senior and an imposing figure. But somebody made him look at my palm( what the hell!) and for some damn reason, he said I was going to be a great dancer some day, if I took it up seriously. I was both shocked and of course, flattered.

But I wonder if he was drunk that day(I heard later that he was in the habit) because my dance moves showed no signs of greatness. His words on the other hand made me feel guilty that I was letting him down by being ordinary. Not that he showed that he remembered what he said. He had a couple of favourite students and they mostly discussed sundry things while we waited our turn for the attention. I think it went on for 2-3 years, I learnt rhythm and a couple of dances, even participated in a dance show in a temple festival as a sidekick but I never really owned it. When the walks to and from the classes and picking wild fruits along the way became more enjoyable, the three of us dropped it altogether. No parent protested.

So when I went to the hostel and learnt that birthday cakes were accompanied by dancing, I only had cold feet. But L was always there for company and to make me feel better. So I figured over the course of four years that all I had to do was to drop any pretence of greatness and give a damn and just flow with the rhythm. Which I did and Khandelwal, the guy I partnered with at the office party, may vouch for that. I felt great that night.

Shrill Campaigns

It's fitting that the election and the IPL seasons have arrived together. One an uglier version of the game of politics and the other of cricket. I'm glad they'll finish together.

The annual fest of the nearby temple is underway. The guy in the orchestra is blaring old songs so much out-of-tune that I feel like auditioning for the role.

Looking Up

Yesterday was the last working day of one of the juniors at work. He belongs to the larger family of Development and my interaction with him in these four years has been only to report issues or to take up escalations from my team. But he sits right next to my team and we've sometimes misused the fact to go and sit on his head. So I wrote to him on his farewell mail thanking him and wishing him luck. He replied saying it felt great to receive such a mail from the 'inspirational lady'. I had to roll my eyes. Even on Women's Day, juniors and peers wished me calling me the same thing. Now it feels rather sad, one way or the other, that I've seen nothing of this inspirational lady.

True Spirit

Always tell the truth. As much as you can.

The Incident

We had a situation in our building a few days ago. Late in the night, a family on a lower floor reported that their resident nanny, a girl of 19-20, was missing. She had gone out for a stroll in the corridor and hadn't returned by the time the couple realised. So a frantic search ensued and she was finally discovered asleep in the security guards' room, which they use to change clothes, eat food etc. One of the two guards was missing and was located asleep on a bench in the nearby park.

Subsequent interrogation brought out conflicting stories. The girl said they had an affair and the guard had promised to marry her. The guy said 'the sister' often gave such unsolicited visits to his room to talk about her worries and he only gave her a patient hearing because he felt sorry for her.

The residents were divided too; some women said they had seen her 'unnecessarily' talking and giggling with security folks and said they had even warned her employer about it. Others, like my maid, who hadn't been witness to anything, were livid that she couldn't keep to herself, being a girl, and had brought disrepute to the entire worker community. Men on the other hand weren't eager to buy the guard's Behenji theory. They suspected that there must be some truth in the girl's account. And there was the bigger problem of his neglecting his duty and sleeping in the park! So he was shouted at and sacked immediately. I think the girl still lives in the building, though I've never seen her outside her house since.

Unpleasant Prospect

L is considering returning to Singapore and I don't like the thought of it. She loves it here and it's all because of AT that she has to relocate all over again now. But one thing is for sure - I'm going to meet her in Singapore every year! I will, I swear! 

Singing to Glory

I had a senior in High School who always sang this song in competitions. She had a powerful voice and she sang it with panache and as I sat in the hall listening to her, I would have a sinking feeling in my heart. If my turn was after hers, it was worse. In my desperation, I would hope that the judges found the song inappropriate for girls of our age. It never happened.

Dream Chase

The crime serials are taking a toll on my dreams. Yesterday I dreamt that I was involved in a chase, good and the bad parties not being clear. A guy was running and there were men behind him, some shooting at him and some wielding knives. And I was running alongside this guy as if I was compelled to run, like a chronicler of the episode. And I remember being surprised that I was so nonchalant about it, considering the potential harm to myself. Anyway, all the bullets missed, thankfully.After some time the guy gave a slip to all of us and I was glad to stand and catch my breath...

Last Days

It's springtime and trees elsewhere are coloured and beautiful but our old friend, the tamarind tree, is almost dry and dead, thanks to the construction that is devouring it. The hawk seems to be mourning the loss too. The tree used to be home to many birds in its heyday, not too long ago.

Keeping It Alive

When we make a movie in India on a socially important issue, it remains relevant even after decades, in one or the other parts of the country. Because our places grow like different generations, some almost a century apart.

When the jackfruit tree does not help in finding which side of the photo is the top and which is the bottom!

Killing Time

I heard ten days ago that we were going to get mega work soon, with short deadlines and complex requirements. Of course I was highly enthused but so far I haven't seen anything of it. It seems to be languishing in some bureaucratic processes, between two sides which are not used to helping each other. I mean, what is it! Rafale deal? What of the deadline!

For Practical Purposes

I think it's better if the future children have no parents, like in Brave New World or something. What are we parents going to do anyway. If we can sort out our messes among themselves without confusing our children, good enough. But yeah, we can make better grandparents I guess, at least to some of the fortunate grandchildren.

DD has joined the get-together gang and it's a huge sigh from me.It's DD and I know that this is my only chance of ever seeing him and shucks, I'm feeling like a terrible sinner. It seems like I've antagonized KR forever but the only relief is that LK understands me. But she still thinks that I'll magically land there on that day. I laughed wholeheartedly. What can one do!

Thinking of it, for all the ordinary life that I've led, I have too big a list of people I feel indebted to. It's as if I've hardly done anything on my own.

Coming to Terms

People who come late to office and say they got "struck on the road/in the traffic" are liable to generate more sympathy than they deserve. The first time I heard it, I was aghast that the guy was beaten up in a case of road rage or something. Then the realization dawned that he was only stuck, like everyone else in Bangalore.

Bangalore is super hot. It feels as if I'm in a kiln, with all the noise around adding to the heat. Clouds have made an appearance in the sky and I hope they shower soon.

A Living Woman

I wish we didn't have this Women's Day noise one day in a year. Happy Woman? I don't know. I want to live life, that's all. I want to be sad, frustrated, angry, troubled, curious, content, crazily happy and so many other things. 

Park Space

We went to Lalbagh last week. I love the place and we all do, actually. I like Cubbon Park too but this one is better, it feels more airy. When Rishi was small, we used to visit Cubbon Park almost every Saturday; Rishi just couldn't do without it. Then Anu was born, we got laptops, work only increased and we dropped the Park routine entirely. Anu keeps complaining that she got a raw deal. When the city landscape changes almost on a daily basis, it's nice to feel a sort of continuity in a place like Lalbagh. The tall, strong and strange looking trees all there nodding their heads, just like you left them years ago.

Going Back

Nostalgia shows you just the green and beautiful hill and makes you long to climb it one more time. Only when you start the ascent do you recollect that there were leeches too!

I connected with my dear old roommate today. She said I laughed just like before. She said she wasn't childish as before. She kept insisting that she'd changed and attributed it to living outside, in Singapore. But one thing hasn't changed, though she won't acknowledge it; she's still naughty.

I connected with VK on LinkedIn(on a spree, you could say) but I'm unsure about what next. What does one do when keeping the silence and breaking it seem equally awkward? I wish LinkedIn didn't show who looked at your profile.

Making the Most of It!

Signboard in Lalbagh. Reminded me of the lady in Metro train who was using the railing to stretch herself generously. Who would've thought that we could be such fitness freaks, right?

Out in the Open

Once I stopped a little girl from being raped. The memory has a nightmarish quality now. I was 10-11 year old and the culprit was a 15 year old boy we called Brother. I burst upon the scene just in time with that instinctive dread and the thought of what-if-I-hadn't made me shake all over. All this while the mothers were outside, talking and laughing.

As summer holidays loom large and I prepare for my mother's harangue that I need to give more freedom to my children, meaning I should let them live with her for two months without my accompanying them, I think of that day and the day my sister almost drowned and some more days and I feel angry and sorry that my mother left so much on a kid's judgement. I hope my children live more freely than that.

Disengagement

L says she'll quit her teaching job and return to the industry. It's a tough decision for her, leaving this dream job. I think the disenchantment began right during her Ph.D. She says she's not able to connect with the students and is also upset with the administration. I hadn't expected it to be such a quick decision and I told her she should persist, given how much her temperament is suitable. But she says she's just not passionate about it anymore. Something about that conversation made me uneasy and worried.