Been There Done That

This article definitely opened up some old stink. I know every word of it firsthand, having experienced it in at least one of my grandparents' place till I was a teenager. Even when I look back through the coloured glass of nostalgia, it's no pretty sight. It was a torture to endure, whether in the day or night, because the fear of being discovered by somebody in the daylight played no less on one's mind. Night of course was a different ball game; even the moonlight wouldn't penetrate the trees which seem suddenly full of ominous sounds, torches that die suddenly and returning is not an option, sit in those trenches praying that nothing bites you and even if something does, it's only an ant and nothing worse, keep calling Aayi just to feel secure....and don't even talk about when it rained. Oh, shit! Just because there was so much unused land all around, people thought there was no need of a toilet! My son hates to go into the toilet when we go to my grandmother's place because he thinks it's not 'nice'. But he doesn't know what relief it was for me to see it the first time! If there is one thing I am upset with my father about, it's that he too didn't get it done sooner.

Sometimes I think I wrongly romanticize about my childhood. Yes, I grew up in a pretty little place which I loved and I don't find that place anymore. But I had many insecurities and complexes of my own, some unwanted and serious burdens and fears, I shared them with nobody and I seem to have been good at keeping them hidden. May be I just force my mind to believe that one thing is another.