Wavering

I've put October as the last month of my current job. I've discussed this with my family and a few people(my lunchmates and L) already and while L alone is very happy about it, others are skeptical to say the least(Rajani is refusing to believe it). My son, who two years ago would've been jumping with joy, is asking me now never to quit and he says he would be embarrassed to tell his friends and teachers that I'm not doing anything. It caught me by surprise and pinched me to think of the many mothers who strive hard at home. Anyway, I think what he's really worried about is our finances. He thinks we make peanuts.

My daughter is supremely happy and she has a big part in my decision. But sometimes, looking around at people of my own circle(not Bangalore of course but back home) I don't know if I'm doing the right thing or I should just delay it the way I've done all these days. Money is the only thing I can offer as help to anybody other than understanding and I know how much that money means to them. Now I can do it without thinking twice but tomorrow? My mother knows the value of this self-earned money so much and she's upset about my decision. But everyday spent at office feels like a day wasted to me these days....

Rishi is down because after the bonanza year of last season, this year he hasn't got any medal. I could see the relief in his eyes when I took his results with equanimity but it also automatically made him feel more guilty. We pampered him a little today - went for Zootopia and a dinner outside. He blushed with suppressed(and surprised) glee when he heard of the plan in the morning. The movie is cute, in spite of all the predictability.