We lost two major figures in our family in the last 10 days. First was my own uncle, my mother's second brother, 67 years old who couldn't win in his battle against cancer. P, V and myself visited him in the hospital only 3 days before and he wasn't so bad at all. Of course he was very weak but he was very clear in his thoughts and was as forceful in his words as ever. He scolded me once and even the nurse was fairly intimidated by him. But unlike before when he would tell us that he's fighting his battle well and wouldn't give up, this time he was clear he was losing it. I felt so sad when he said, "all our hopes are dashed, my dear", I couldn't even say a word of comfort. I wanted to say so many things, how he's been such an inspiration to me whenever I think of some distress, that it's none of his fault that he's got this damn disease and ...what to say! Poor thing, slogged all his life right from his childhood and all he wanted was peaceful life after retirement, to make the rocky area around his house a green land. One who would regularly send postcard letters to all the other members of the family whether they replied or not. Very childlike in his innocence, his ignorance some times...
My earliest memory of my uncle I think is of his showing me his dark hair and asking me not to tell Amma that it was dyed! I don't think Amma would've reprimanded him, though... He used to come to my native once every two years with his family - Atte and 3 daughetrs. He and Atte had a very harmonious life, may be I think because as I could see, Atte was in control of every aspect of his household and he was very happy not to be bothered with anything. He used to call her for every small thing and I'm sure she would feel very odd for some time now not to hear his voice...He was in a big post in UTI but nobody who saw him in hometown could say that; he would just have a towel around his waist and slog like a beast in the fields along with my youngest uncle. I remember sitting in a boat with him at the helm and he took me along our backwaters for quite a while and finally when I had to alight, I slipped and fell into the water and he had to pull me out. He was distantly affectionate towards children, I felt even to his own. May be that was the hallmark of his generation itself.
Next, he used to come to Mangalore every 6 months or so on work and never went without visiting us even if it was only for a quick dinner. Unlike other uncles, he never gave us money but brought all the complimentary things that he would get in his star hotel room. When UTI opened its branch in Mangalore, he invited us for the ceremony. My chemistry teacher, who was an agent himself, saw me with new eyes that day. He even told me that he didn't know I had such connections! After the ceremony we went to Taj Manjarun, a marvel to us and had dinner there and even rested in his room for a while. His driver drove us back home that night and listening to "Aye mere humsafar, Aye mere jane jaan.." with the cool air blowing into my hair is one of the most beautiful memories of my life.
Later when was on deputation in Mumbai, I used to visit him regularly there. They had a good house in Santacruz and Atte made me meet many of my distant relatives who I only knew existed. I visited Juhu beach also and Atte's Hindi gave me a lot of confidence to speak, I must admit.
I feel bad for Amma who of course has a lion's heart, really. Just a week after her son died, her brother died too. It seems he had called up only the previous day to console Amma and then the next day, he went without a noise. I had visited him 4 years ago and he was very happy to know that I was interested in books - he had cupboards of them. My Amma's only remaining brother he was....
And now to add, we've lost another relative and one of the best people we knew. My Aunt's brother-in-law passed away last week after a sudden illness. It's kind of bizarre actually, losing the people you've always admired, respected and loved, one after another. Hope we have nothing more of it at least for a long time.
My earliest memory of my uncle I think is of his showing me his dark hair and asking me not to tell Amma that it was dyed! I don't think Amma would've reprimanded him, though... He used to come to my native once every two years with his family - Atte and 3 daughetrs. He and Atte had a very harmonious life, may be I think because as I could see, Atte was in control of every aspect of his household and he was very happy not to be bothered with anything. He used to call her for every small thing and I'm sure she would feel very odd for some time now not to hear his voice...He was in a big post in UTI but nobody who saw him in hometown could say that; he would just have a towel around his waist and slog like a beast in the fields along with my youngest uncle. I remember sitting in a boat with him at the helm and he took me along our backwaters for quite a while and finally when I had to alight, I slipped and fell into the water and he had to pull me out. He was distantly affectionate towards children, I felt even to his own. May be that was the hallmark of his generation itself.
Next, he used to come to Mangalore every 6 months or so on work and never went without visiting us even if it was only for a quick dinner. Unlike other uncles, he never gave us money but brought all the complimentary things that he would get in his star hotel room. When UTI opened its branch in Mangalore, he invited us for the ceremony. My chemistry teacher, who was an agent himself, saw me with new eyes that day. He even told me that he didn't know I had such connections! After the ceremony we went to Taj Manjarun, a marvel to us and had dinner there and even rested in his room for a while. His driver drove us back home that night and listening to "Aye mere humsafar, Aye mere jane jaan.." with the cool air blowing into my hair is one of the most beautiful memories of my life.
Later when was on deputation in Mumbai, I used to visit him regularly there. They had a good house in Santacruz and Atte made me meet many of my distant relatives who I only knew existed. I visited Juhu beach also and Atte's Hindi gave me a lot of confidence to speak, I must admit.
I feel bad for Amma who of course has a lion's heart, really. Just a week after her son died, her brother died too. It seems he had called up only the previous day to console Amma and then the next day, he went without a noise. I had visited him 4 years ago and he was very happy to know that I was interested in books - he had cupboards of them. My Amma's only remaining brother he was....
And now to add, we've lost another relative and one of the best people we knew. My Aunt's brother-in-law passed away last week after a sudden illness. It's kind of bizarre actually, losing the people you've always admired, respected and loved, one after another. Hope we have nothing more of it at least for a long time.
